Found P to be online the other day..so I said hello...thanked her for the Christmas card...Birthday card...P is H's friend...I met her while I was in VN...H introduced me to her..and we had an afternoon together...a coffee...talked..she took me shopping...
We still keep in contact..and then of course we talked about H...she sent me photos...and I commented that he's gotten fatter...she asked...you haven't seen him? I told her no...I asked how he was...she said he's okie...and that he still thinks of me and B...and that he thinks she is his...he confided in her that I am bound to him by B...
I sent photos to her..I asked her do you see? she is not his...she agreed...she said H won't see that...he still believes she is his...
B still ask for uncle..once in awhile...other than that she gives her dad hugs and kisses...and of course out of me and her dad he is her favourite...it is what I had hope for...for when she was younger she wouldn't come to him....she would only come to me and H...
I still feel guilty...by being weak I made those that are close to me suffer....every time I try to tell H that she is not his he would simply shrug it off...he said it doesn't matter...she can be his adopted daughter..as he only has sons.
every birthday he still comes...bearing gifts for her...last year she started school...so he's asked for photos...
he had hinted last time he wanted to visit me more often...but dont have an opportunity to...as I have closed my heart...my door...I didn't say anything...didn't know what to say...
I have made a mistake..and wanted to correct it...trying my best to correct it...make his family happy that they have got him back...so his wife don't cry anymore...make hubby happy that he's got another daughter at last.....make B happy that she is in a secure environment...
P said...what is done is done...no use...I know that...yet part of me feel guilty..will never know who's daughter she is...just hope I haven't made a mistake...I will never get a DNA test for her...will just let it go...that is all I can do...
2008-2009
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